7 Bits of Inner-Beauty Advice from Mom

7 Bits of Inner-Beauty Advice from Mom

A mother shares seven pieces of inner-beauty advice with her daughter.

By: Karen Walrond

My daughter turned 9 years old this year. As she gets older and begins to navigate relationships, school politics and tackles more advanced subjects in class, I find myself more invested in ensuring that her self-esteem and sense of integrity remain intact. I was raised by a wise mother and a grandmother, and they greatly informed my own ideas of what it means to be a strong, confident woman. So recently, remembering their words of advice coupled with my own experience, I decided to codify the best of what I know for my own daughter.

Here’s what I came up with and what I will be telling my daughter anytime she stops long enough to listen.

1. Your Ability or Inability to Accomplish Something Should Never be Defined by Your Gender
Some people will try to argue that simply by virtue of your gender, you are biologically incapable of doing something. But unless that something directly involves certain specific contributions to the creation of a baby, then, frankly, they are misinformed.

2. You Should Know How to Travel to a Foreign Country by Yourself, How to Enjoy Your Own Company and How to Change a Flat Tire
Also, remember that tattoos are forever, so, child, think before you ink.


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3. You Should Know How to Cook a Delicious Meal From Scratch, Without the Need For a Written Recipe, the Taste of Which Will Make a Grown Adult Weep in Ecstasy
Bonus points if it's cuisine from the Old Country (whatever that country might be), because I think it's important for every young person to know how to make at least one dish that comes from her people.

4. You Should Understand That While Fashion and Makeup Are Fun, They Are Ultimately Simply Ornaments
Remember that even during the holidays, while ornaments are pretty, an unadorned home is beautiful in its own right. I want you to figure out your own different and your own beauty, and know how to rock it even without a push-up bra, a miniskirt, stilettos or a fad diet in sight.

5. You Need to be Confident Enough to Say "No" When You Know That Saying "Yes" Will Make You Feel Like a Tiny Bit of Your Soul is Dying
Remember that saying "no" in these situations isn't impolite, it's honest. Be kind, but be firm. And mean it. Always.

6. Understand Viscerally That the Life You Have is Really Good, and Millions of People In the Rest of the World Have Much Tougher Lives Than You Do
Realize that this is due simply to the fact that you happened to be born in a part of the world where opportunity is plentiful. And therefore, you need to find a way to use your own unique gifts, whatever you discover them to be, to help create opportunity for others. Because gifts are nothing if they're not given away.

7. Call Your Mother. No, Really, Call Her.

When she isn't sharing tips on StyleUnited on how to add more awesome to your life, you can find Karen on Chookooloonks.com. She's on a mission to prove to you that your life is filled with different, unique moments of beauty, starting with her book, The Beauty of Different. Her work can be seen on Babble.com, TEDxHouston and USAToday.

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